I’ve a little something to say to the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

I know full well that you’re just itching to uphold your oaths of office and restore that jurisdiction to its lawful operation. Your complaint is that you do not have popular support.

You will agree that the events of the past twelve years constitute a military conquering, a military operation executed by compartmentalized foreign and domestic intelligence agencies.

Military matters are within your purview, as evidenced by the fruit salad you’ve awarded each other. You’re war heroes, I’ll concede that.

So since you claim to be the experts on military matters, and since events of the past twelve years constitute a military attack, why are you deferring to the perceptions of the general public who would not know the first thing about military operations?

Who around here are the military experts? Who are supposed to be on point? Who the hell around here is defending the nation? The self-propelled belly roaming around Wal-Mart on a search and consume mission, some guy who doesn’t even know what planet he’s on, much less anything of military matters? Or you?

Are you then claiming that your military acumen is precisely equivalent to that of every moron walking down the street? Then what’s with the uniforms and the shoulder boards?

Precisely what the hell do we pay you for?

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